I'm a bit disappointed after the State of the Union address earlier this week.
Count me as one of those Americans upset that President Obama didn't address the issue that has me most concerned right now: The threat to our right as Americans to laugh at stupid people on the Internet.
Perhaps you heard about Cathy Cruz Marrero last week. She became Internet famous as "the woman who fell into a mall water fountain while texting."
It happened at a Reading, Pa., shopping mall, where the 49-year-old Cruz Marrero apparently works. She was captured on a security camera video looking down at her phone while sending a text message. She didn't see the fountain in front of her (those big ol' things are so easy to miss, right?) and plopped into it face first.
Instead of accepting her shame privately, Cruz Marrero made the rounds on the morning news shows to tell her story. Not to laugh at herself for a brainless blunder. But to say she may actually sue the mall because she was so humiliated after the video leaked online.
I have a few problems with this. The first: What happened to personal accountability? You did something dumb, accept it, laugh at it, then get over it.
The second: If you work at the mall, you should probably know where the water fountain is. I haven't heard about people walking face-first into the carousel at Manchester.
But the biggest problem is the precedent it could set. What if more people shamed on the Internet started suing?
The future of catching idiots on video is in the balance here. I don't want to live in a world where stupid people can't be mocked on the Internet.
That's why Al Gore invented it. (And, of course, to post cute pictures of puppies and kittens, and complain about bad service at restaurants, too).
If "fountain lady" is able to turn this whole silly ordeal into a valid lawsuit, what will become of our society?
Will it create a spiral toward Internet uptightedness?
Will the lady who crazily attacked workers at a McDonald's drive-through in Ohio have legal recourse after her million views' worth of Internet shame?
Will the boob-slapping guy who found fame (and 4 million YouTube views) last year as "Worst wedding DJ ever" sue for damages to his wedding DJ rep?
This is America. If we're not free to laugh at people who get caught in public acting like fools, what are we free to do?
To people like "fountain lady" who get caught in a humiliating situation, just know this: The Internet gives us someone new to laugh at every day.
Don't sue. Don't get upset. Just grin and bear it, knowing you gave me and millions of other people a good laugh.