Sometimes it's the little things that count in making judicial writing spicy enough to be interesting.
Consider, for instance, the small touch U.S. District Judge James Boasberg uses in a new decision. Judge Boasberg begins this way:
"Plaintiff Daniel Virtue is something of a collector."
See how that works? We are immediately drawn in to find out more: what does he collect? There's a hint of something, well, mysterious here. We can almost discern a cocked eyebrow in the judge, a bit of drollery, before the mystery is solved as follows:
"Over the course of his employment with the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, with his local union, and as a rank-and-file Teamster, he has collected memberships in at least four Teamsters-affiliated pension plans. In this lawsuit, he seeks to acquire membership in (and benefits from) a fifth IBT pension fund. Unfortunately for Virtue, his quest to assemble a complete portfolio of IBT pension plans ends here."
And see how that paragraph ends, emphatically, with the definitive "ends here
." That is the sound of a door shutting and a lock being turned with a hard click.